I Am Still Alive!

So for those who are still following my blog posts despite my inconsistency, I applaud you. I know it has been a long time and at this point I am just going to tell you guys not to expect anything from me because if I say I am going to write more, it does not happen. So maybe doing the opposite will produce opposite results. Guess we will wait and see.

Anyway, I just really thought about it and I really do want to get back into blogging again. I have not written in a long time, but writing is a part of my soul. I love to write. No matter how good or bad I write, it soothes my soul to know that I can produce words that may mean something to someone out there.

How's life been for me?

Life has been crazy for me, adjusting to having two boys close in age, but I am adapting. Unfortunately, my vlogs have not survived either, but I want to start it up again. I give props to all the families who do vlogs because they take so much time especially to edit. I need to know your secrets for those who vlog with families!

Anyway, I am still living with my parents. Anthony found a trucking job and he has been working there since May. I only see him a few times a month or so because he does long hauls, so that is something else I have been adjusting to. Also, I have been planning our wedding. We plan to get married in June 2018 and I am so excited! We have so much on our plate right now.

Anyone else getting married soon or engaged? We can talk about weddings together!

Thank you for reading! I know it's short, but I wanted to let you guys know I haven't died.

Love you all! ❤

New Vlogger Here

Hey everyone! So it has been a little over three months since Anthony's birth and I want to apologize for not writing (once again). I always seem to lose track. But today I wanted to let you guys know that I STARTED VLOGGING! My channel is ITwithIrishTwins, but I am planning to change the name because I don't feel like it fits. I want to start doing other videos mixed in with vlogs, so that is what I am probably going to be doing. You guys should check it out. https://www.youtube.com/user/IzziBella15 <--My channel. So check that out, like and subscribe. It would make my day ♡

So, the point of this post was basically to just let you guys know I am doing vlogs and videos now. I am going to aim to post on my BLOG here weekly. If you guys  have ideas for anything at all! Please leave a comment, thank you so much! Stay tuned for more!

I know I need to improve on posting more. What's something you need to improve on? (So I don't feel like the only one). Lol.

HAVE A GREAT DAY

Anthony Carmelo's Birth

So, wanna know the story of how Anthony Carmelo was born? You're in the right place! As everyone knows, I was having trouble finding a midwife so I called another place and got an appointment with an OBGYN. Unfortunately, I read terrible reviews about the guy before going, but turns out he wasn't so bad. I had never been to an OBGYN before so I don't really know, but all I can say is I still prefer a midwife. So much LESS invasive with a midwife ya know. Anyway, turns out I was 4 cms dialated and shortly after we left I was getting consistent contractions and then they weren't consistent. Later in the night my contractions got pretty strong and I couldn't sleep..in fact I was trying my best to slow down my labor in hopes that I wouldn't have the baby until Anthony(my fiance) was able to get there. But at that point I realized I'd never get any sleep so I got up and did stuff to help it move along. We left around 3am and arrived at the birth center around 3:30am.

Now, my contractions were strong but they were not consistent. Some were 5 minutes  or even 10 minutes apart.

We got a birthing suite right away and they had a fetal monitor on me, but luckily they couldn't put me on an IV for antibiotics cause my contractions got too close. They were going to put me on antibiotics cause I literally just got swabbed for my strep B test the day before when I found out I was 4 cms dialated. So, they didn't know the results and were going to put me on them just incase. But I'm glad they didn't cause having an IV in my arm would have made me feel so much more uncomfortable.

Now, it wasn't long before it felt like I had to push, but they told me not to push cause I was still 8-9 centimeters. Boy was I frustrated cause about every minute I said I wanted to push so they continuously checked me which hurt like hell and made me very uncomfortable.

The OBGYN on call that night fortunately finally said to let me push, and he suggested to break my water cause it would help it go faster, so I let him. It was a weird feeling. And I finally was pushing and soon enough he was born,  but the head crowning hurt like hell too which I don't remember feeling with Angelo even though Angelo was a bigger baby.

Anyway he was born at 4:30am, about an hour after we arrived there, so good thing we left when we did.

I had to stay in the hospital a little longer than usual just until they got the strep B test results back and turns out it was clear and I would not have needed the antibiotics anyway! Thank you God!

Even though my birth experience with Anthony wasn't as perfect as it was with Angelo I'm still thankful I did not have to go through more pain with the IV or my worst nightmare, a Csection. And I didn't do any pain medicine  either and successfully did it all natural once again. I'm very thankful for that. ♡ I know some people aren't as lucky as I am. Which is unfortunate. I'm just hoping that next time I'll know sooner that I'm pregnant and be able to have a home birth again with a midwife. Or even a midwife at the birth center opposed to an OBGYN.

So, now in the end we have another beautiful baby boy who arrived just in time for Easter, and both of my boys celebrated their first Easter together. ♡

Five Weeks Postpartum

Hey everyone! By the title you can assume that I've bad my baby! SURPRISE, we had another little boy. He was born April 13th so my boys are 11 months and 1 day apart. It took us the longest time to name him, but we settled on Anthony Carmelo. :)

Now, I'll write the birth story separate in another post, but this post is about how I'm doing now at five weeks later. Gotta say, I'm feeling pretty good. It's another adjustment to get used to taking care of a smaller baby even if it was only a year ago that I was doing this, but we're getting used to it. Angelo still isn't walking on his own yet, but he's getting close. He's become a pretty big boy within the past few months, drinking from cups, practicing to use a fork, eating food that everyone else eats, etc. He understands what "hi" means, but still hasn't had his first word yet.

Anyway, I feel like I get a pretty good amount of sleep each night and I bounced back again after this baby, but I still got some flab that just needs to be toned up. Overall, I feel stretched more cause of having another baby so soon, didn't give me much time to heal all the way after Angelo. But we'll make it work! :)

I feel excited to know that Angelo will have somebody to play with. He already trys to rock his brother to sleep in his bouncer or carseat sometimes, but gotta watch or he'll try to climb in too. Lol.

Looking forward to our journey ahead :) Thank you for reading.

I love my babies ♡♡♡

Long Time no Post...

I'm so sorry that I haven't been writing weekly anymore. I have had a lot happen, one being that I am pregnant with baby number two! I only found out in December because I felt kicking. By the time I got an ultrasound they estimated me to be 29 weeks along. So, I haven't had a lot of prenantal care.

We lost our house in PA which honestly, was illegal that we were kicked out, but a lawyer costs too much. So, Tony and I decided it would be best for me to move and stay with my parents. So that's where I'm at now.

I've been trying to get a midwife and I want to go to a birth center since I couldn't pay $3500 by 36 weeks to the homebirth midwife around here.

Unfortunately today, they told me the midwifes where I was planning to go don't feel comfortable taking me because I haven't had a lot of prenantal care. It didn't help that my previous midwives took forever to send my records. How am I gonna get more care if they don't want me? So, that broke my heart because right when I thought I was going to be all set and have everything prepared it just fell apart. This Friday I will be 38 weeks. It's ridiculous. I'm just feeling so overwhelmed and stressed. No pregnant woman should have to feel this way! I'm worried that I won't get the birth that I want. It's pretty scary.

Then, there's people who will judge you because you didn't have "adequate prenatal care." It's not my fault I didn't know I was pregnant until late, then unexpectedly lost our house (lost our car in an accident before that), and so I had to find a midwife in NY, and so I ended up moving to OH to have to find someone else and no one wants me now cause they're all scared. :(

I had a very perfect birth the first time. I understand why some people don't want to take someone who is near the end without much prenantal care, but how does it help if no one will accept them?

If I go into labor before finding anyone who can take me, I hope they'll accept me at the hospital I want to go to even if it would require constant fetal monitoring. As long as I can still get as much of a natural birth as possible, I will be happy. I'm just hoping and praying.

Good luck to me! This birth experience won't be like my first unfortunately, but hoping for the best.

Isn't it ridiculous that I'm having a second baby not even a year later? It's so hard to believe. I was just so busy with my son that I never noticed symptoms I guess. Also, hoping for a little girl this time. #irishtwins

Wish me luck! If you've gone through something similar feel free to comment!