I'm so sorry that I haven't been writing weekly anymore. I have had a lot happen, one being that I am pregnant with baby number two! I only found out in December because I felt kicking. By the time I got an ultrasound they estimated me to be 29 weeks along. So, I haven't had a lot of prenantal care.
We lost our house in PA which honestly, was illegal that we were kicked out, but a lawyer costs too much. So, Tony and I decided it would be best for me to move and stay with my parents. So that's where I'm at now.
I've been trying to get a midwife and I want to go to a birth center since I couldn't pay $3500 by 36 weeks to the homebirth midwife around here.
Unfortunately today, they told me the midwifes where I was planning to go don't feel comfortable taking me because I haven't had a lot of prenantal care. It didn't help that my previous midwives took forever to send my records. How am I gonna get more care if they don't want me? So, that broke my heart because right when I thought I was going to be all set and have everything prepared it just fell apart. This Friday I will be 38 weeks. It's ridiculous. I'm just feeling so overwhelmed and stressed. No pregnant woman should have to feel this way! I'm worried that I won't get the birth that I want. It's pretty scary.
Then, there's people who will judge you because you didn't have "adequate prenatal care." It's not my fault I didn't know I was pregnant until late, then unexpectedly lost our house (lost our car in an accident before that), and so I had to find a midwife in NY, and so I ended up moving to OH to have to find someone else and no one wants me now cause they're all scared. :(
I had a very perfect birth the first time. I understand why some people don't want to take someone who is near the end without much prenantal care, but how does it help if no one will accept them?
If I go into labor before finding anyone who can take me, I hope they'll accept me at the hospital I want to go to even if it would require constant fetal monitoring. As long as I can still get as much of a natural birth as possible, I will be happy. I'm just hoping and praying.
Good luck to me! This birth experience won't be like my first unfortunately, but hoping for the best.
Isn't it ridiculous that I'm having a second baby not even a year later? It's so hard to believe. I was just so busy with my son that I never noticed symptoms I guess. Also, hoping for a little girl this time. #irishtwins
Wish me luck! If you've gone through something similar feel free to comment!
